Angry Bob

Posted: 19 March 2005 in other folks
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I work with an angry man named Angry Bob. I have not changed his name to protect him. Angry Bob frequently rages about passing inconveniences. His favorite subjects are 1) other people doing unreasonable things and 2) other people in general. Bob is often angry that other people exist at all. Things that Bob does when he’s not angry at work:
Writes in his blog (if you know Angry Bob’s blog, do let me in on it)
Sleeps
Eats Krispy Kremes 9 at a time
Watches 6 episodes of The Family Guy consecutively
Tries to convince his male coworkers to introduce him to hot girls

You might wonder how I know so much about Angry Bob. Not only is Bob angry, he is forthcoming and, maybe, a bit lonely. Especially in the wee hours that usually only lovers share. Last night, Bob convinced a coworker to introduce him to hot women. They were not, unfortunately, single. Not only did this make Bob angry, it provoked him into calling his ex girlfriend. Although you might be speculating about her rationale for leaving such a charmer – could it be the rpg? or has she seen his blog, the lucky girl? – I suspect it is not least because Angry Bob is a drunk dialer. He admits that he has been counseled by this same coworker (not of stellar character) not to call, but he laments that his ex girlfriend will forget him. Or, worse yet, move on. Strange though, this does not make Bob angry, only rather Hamlet-like.

Bob just came to tell me that the real reason he loves the movie Napoleon Dynamite is because of the man-friendship between Napoleon and Presidente Pedro. He then trailed off wistfully…

My observation: it’s hard for Bob to be genuinely angry before 6:00 in the morning. His anger is more sputtering and less rage. Bonus points if you, too, are less angry in the pre-dawn hours.

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